Well I must say, it's been a while since I wrote a news related article, but the other so-called journalists have all been engaged in some frightful waste of time, in the form of a computer game. If ever there was a more persausive argument to bring back National Service, then I fail utterly to think of what it could be.
Now I must admit that I don't tend to follow American Politics, as my main responsibilty is getting free meals from terrified restaurant owners, on the off-chance that I will write something nice about them in one of my articles. However, I have been asked to write a short piece about the resignation of Colin Powell because all the other staff are too busy playing their stupid game. Luckily, I have had the pleasure of dining with the former US Secretary of State, when he was over in Harlow, Essex last year, and I used my considerable influence to get us both a free slap-up grill at the wonderful Cafe Delight.
I remember Colin was unable to decide between the Mighty Grill and my own personal favourite, the Chef's Grill. I remember he giggled as he noticed that one of the items listed for the Mighty Grill was a Bender. We both had a bit of a laugh, but then I explained to him that it was in fact a highly sophisticated delicacy, made from the finest saveloy, sliced, but not all the way through, allowing it to bend in a horseshoe shape, then cooked on the hotplate. For all he'd achieved in his high flying career, he felt he was not quite adventurous enough to try such an unusual item.
In the end, he went for the double breakfast and I - my usual - the Super Brunch, which is a delicate blend of cooking styles, fusing traditional English Breakfast with french cuisine, by adding a huge portion of frozen chips - tres bon. To accompany, I selected a bottle of Tizer and a mug of tea, while he had a Coke which I thought rather vulgar considering he'd ordered fried eggs, but then he is American, so I didn't say anything. Although what I really wanted to do was take him to one side and say "My dear chap, perhaps a Seven-Up would be more appropriate".
The food was good - I got egg all down my blazer and tie which made the second most powerful political man in the world at the time laugh and we chatted away, as I pressed him to reveal some tidbit about President Bush. A man of Powell's stature doesn't give much away though, it comes with the job and he did a marvelous job of avoiding answering any questions about US foreign policy, the War in Iraq or any of the subjects in which I tried to engage him.
We parted company as good friends, I with my egg stained Blazer, bade farewell to the man who had stood before the UN Security Council to argue the case for the use of military force to remove Saddam Hussein as he explained chattily that he was taking the leftover toast with him, wrapped in a serviette, along with two or three sachets of sugar, for the flight back.